loving the little years.
I finished Rachel Jankovic’s book, Loving the Little Years: Motherhood In the Trenches, just now. It is short and fun and practical, and is one I’ll probably reread many times; I highly recommend it.
It makes me love my kids even more. It also makes me feel more overwhelmed with this task—this calling—of motherhood than ever. It inspires me with new ideas and, I think most of all, it makes me long to enjoy it all.
I have so much to learn about motherhood, about dying to myself and consistent discipline and teaching my children about Jesus. But after reading this book, the two things I pray for are repentance and joy.
Repentance. I am a performer. I want a formula to make things go right in my world, to make people happy with me, to make God love me. I hate, hate to mess up, and will spend more time and energy lambasting myself for my sins and failures and perceived-failures than in receiving grace and the joy of forgiveness. This is something God is going to great lengths to free me from (and he is freeing me!), and Jankovic’s words are music to my awakening ears.
She writes, shockingly, that it’s okay to mess up. We sin and make mistakes and hurt our kids. And our sin and repentance and confession is the real-life stage on which they see God’s grace acted out. In the mundane events of daily life, as we learn to deal with our hearts “always and first,” they learn that God makes all things new (even their mommy), and that there is hope for their own sinful hearts.
Joy. I’m a complainer. David sometimes teases me that I’m a pessimist—I like to say I’m a “realist,” but we both know I have a tendency to see the negative side of life. I can look back, exhausted, at the end of a day and only remember that the kids argued constantly, and the number of times I snapped at Judah for not listening, and the fact that Amie refused to take her afternoon nap. I tell my kids to stop complaining, but what am I living out in front of them?
I love Rachel Jankovic’s emphasis on giving thanks and enjoying this season of life we’re in. I’m inspired by her challenge to have a robust sense of humor, to stop taking myself so seriously and focusing on the negative, and to, in everything, thank God for the amazing privilege of motherhood.
So I practiced tonight. I worked on our bookshelf-top gratitude list. I smiled more. I laughed for no reason and was goofy with Judah. I whooped with happiness when Amie found long-lost Slinky Dog hiding behind the couch. I can’t say that anything productive happened as a result, but we certainly had more fun—and I look back on our evening with a smile instead of a sigh.
Jankovic says, “It’s no abstract thing—the state of your heart is the state of your home,” which means my family is in big trouble if God doesn’t reach down and work in my heart every day. I’m so thankful that he is.
7 Comments
Bethany
Thanks for recommending this book, Jules! I saw an ad for it in the Credenda Agenda the other day, and it caught my eye…now I’ll definitely read it!
Love you!
julie gentino
Love you too my dear! Yes, read it and then we can chat on the phone about it! 🙂
Inka
Hi Julie,
I finished this book a couple of weeks ago and I was also very encouraged and challenged…I’ve been learning so much about motherhood, what a wonderful calling it is and how important it is in God’s eyes what we do every day…so, thank you for sharing your thoughts on this book – I am totally with you! =) I’ve been wanting to comment on your blog for so long, but sometimes it is hard for me to find the right words for what I ‘really’ want to say in English…so I give up, or don’t even try. I wanted to let you know that I have been touched by what you are going through, and I think it is so brave of you to share what is going on. I think it is always so humbling to realize, that God can use me and work in me the best, when I am broken and helpless. This is when he comes and reveals Himself… I’ve been thinking about this a lot…thank you for sharing and encouraging me and others through that. Be blessed, Inka
julie gentino
Thank you for saying this, Inka! It means so much to hear from you …
“God can use me and work in me the best, when I am broken and helpless. This is when he comes and reveals Himself.”
Your words are so true. Thank you for encouraging me today!
Ashley Murray
Wow Jules, I will definitely have to pick this up! Thank you for your comments and your openness to share! I can always count on you for meaningful book recommendations. 🙂 I have been praying for you and even watching a National Geographic documentary on your S.A. country to help know how to pray for you! Love you!!!
Ash
brantley
I have to admit that I have to force myself to read parenting books…I so much prefer fiction…probably because I read at night after the children are in bed and at that point in the day I’m ready to do something for myself. 🙂 Anyway, this one sounds great, I will definitely pick it up! Thanks for the recommendation.
Lauren
A mom from my church just handed me this book last Sunday! I can’t wait to start reading it! Thanks for your recommendation Jules- I always know I won’t be wasting my time if YOU like something 🙂