fifth year of homeschooling: the details.

 

Thanks so much for your kind feedback about my post on homeschooling with depression. It’s always good to know we aren’t alone, isn’t it?

But I know that if you’re a homeschooling friend you may be thinking, “Julie, I’m very glad you made it through a year with depression, but, um, I need some details. How did school go? Did you like your curriculum? How was your year without Classical Conversations? What will you do differently next year?”

These are the burning questions in the minds of homeschooling mothers (and sometimes fathers too), and it makes me laugh that we must ask them of one another. We’ve got an insatiable need to debrief, to talk about the things that we loved and the things we hated and everything in between. We need to problem solve, to talk homeschool philosophies and curriculum and podcasts and scheduling. Ad nauseam.

I’m thankful for friends who let me pick their brains over and over for ideas. Summer is the time for exchanging ideas, because many of us are neck-deep in planning next year.

And so don’t worry, dear readers! I’ll do the same for you!

I decided to tackle this post by answering the questions I get most often. Make yourself a cup of tea and I’ll sit with mine, and we’ll just pretend we’re having a conversation (a conversation where, apparently, I get to do all the talking).

Here goes!

 

 

How did it go homeschooling three grades?

It went … tired.

But we did it!

It was a lot to juggle. I didn’t always get it all done. Actually, I rarely got everything done. And yet somehow, we stayed legal and met all our requirements this year and then some. I will say that Judah is becoming very independent with his work. I can give him a daily list and a few directions and he does most of it on his own. That helps a great deal.

So, if you’re looking ahead to the years of adding more kids, factor in two things: 1. Your older children are becoming independent learners, and 2. You’ve gained experience as a homeschool parent. You know what to expect by now (although granted, each child learns differently). This year was my third time homeschooling first grade. It gets so much easier with time, especially if you haven’t changed curriculum much.

Honestly, I think it’s way easier to homeschool three grades than to homeschool with toddlers around!

Gabe used all of the exact same workbooks that Judah did in first grade. We continue to use Ordinary Parent’s Guide to Teaching Reading for reading lessons, and then switch to Pathway Readers once the kids are ready for chapter books.

This year I taught my third child to read!

Teaching reading is a laborious process, but there’s just nothing in the world like seeing a student take off and begin to decipher words on their own and become fluent enough to really connect with the story. It’s one of my favorite parts of homeschooling.

 

 

So yes, teaching three was a lot, but with each new kid and each unique challenge, I learn to rest a little more in Christ’s sufficiency. He cares more about my children’s education than I do. He asks me to organize myself and them as much as possible, and be faithful every day in the small things, and He grows them. He grows our whole family. Even on the days I don’t feel like I did a good job at anything.

Each year, I’m amazed by how much my children learn. Children are born learners. They are sponges. They teach me by the way they soak up knowledge. I love that Charlotte Mason says our job is to “spread a feast before them.” Every single year, no matter how hard I’ve worked or what gaps I’ve left, I feel that the ways my kids have learned and grown are in so much greater proportion to what I put in. That’s not an excuse to be lazy. It just means: God is faithful.

I love being part of the process.

 

 

Noah’s five now, isn’t he? Are you ready to add a fourth grade to the load next year?

Hmmm. To be honest, I’m scared stiff of adding Noah to our school schedule. He’s my strong-willed kid. We’ve worked hard over these last three years. Choosing to homeschool him feels like a leap of faith. But it was with each of my children, wasn’t it? And I’m trying to learn to lighten up a little. Life would be boring without leaps of faith.

I’m praying about this coming year. I’m asking the Lord to use homeschooling a strong-willed child to make me more dependent on Him rather than trying to be in control and trying to perform. I’m praying that I’ll remember to have fun. I just have a few short years with my strong-willed child at home.

I’m asking God to keep me from stereotyping Noah or underestimating him. I don’t want him being labeled as the “problem kid.” God gave Him to our family and to our homeschool on purpose. He has many strengths and a way of seeing the world that’s totally unique. I want to be a learner in our dynamic, and I want him to feel accepted, just the way he is.

The more I find ways to inspire Noah and connect with the things he loves (bugs. the outdoors. bugs), the easier it is to engage him.

We can do this. I choose to be optimistic about homeschooling four kids next year!

 

 

What did you think of your break from Classical Conversations?

We were apart of a Classical Conversations homeschool community for four years, and decided to take a break this past year. For many reasons. Mostly, I was exhausted. The kids were all very disappointed to quit, but they got over it and all said they enjoyed our year.

The first semester felt amazing. It was so nice not having that weekly commitment.

But come January we hit a wall. Actually, I hit a wall. I attribute some of that to my battle with depression.

But I also realized — after I rested and recovered — that we missed the rhythm and accountability. Especially in that long second semester. CC especially brings a bit of energy to dark winter days in January and February. The kids love weekly classroom time and their tutors and art projects and science. Even though it’s not a drop-off program — I stay with them — I love having a break from talking at my kids one school day a week. It’s refreshing for all of us.

Judah will be in fifth grade this year (can you believe it?). We worked on writing some together with a curriculum a friend gave me, but I was not consistent with it, and I lived with year-long guilt about that. It was hard juggling three grades and my depression caused me to pare down to the basics.

Here’s something I learned during our break: I am really good at creating a cozy, inspiring environment for us to learn together. I am not so good at pushing my kids academically. They need to be challenged more than I’m able to do with my personality.

So we made the decision to go back to CC in August. Judah and I visited a campus much closer to our house and really liked it. I’m thrilled that our new community day is Wednesday, instead of Monday. Mondays were always so hard for me after busy Sundays with ministry.

All four kids will participate in CC on Wednesday mornings (I will rotate helping out in their classes). Noah’s involvement in the program as a kindergartener will help with adding him to the mix at home. And as a fifth grader, Judah will attend the afternoon Essentials class too, which consists of writing, grammar, and math games.

I felt hugely relieved last year to be taking the year off. And I feel hugely relieved this year to be trying again.

Isn’t it funny how that works?

 

 

Did you like using Sonlight curriculum?

You may remember that I decided to go with Sonlight Core D: American History and Geography last year. We bought the package that included Instructor’s Guide (with scheduling), literature, and science, and I planned to modify it so that I could use it with both my 10 and 8-year-olds.

Here’s the thing: I love Sonlight. I mean, love it. I’m embarrassed to admit how many homeschool curriculums I researched back when Judah was four years old. I was trying to decide if this homeschooling thing was even for us, and so I needed to know what kind of resources were out there.

I bought the 4K package when we lived in India. We enjoyed it. We ended up abandoning the schedule of the teacher’s guide though and just reading the books on our own. I have to tell you we still regularly read the books we bought in that package — over 6 years ago. We used many of them with Gabe and Noah this past year.

Once we moved back to the States and joined CC I decided to supplement our year with Sonlight read-alouds from their online lists. And we loved them so much each year.

So it felt natural to choose Sonlight this past year.

But you know what? Just as with 4K, I didn’t love the package.

I realized I am not a school-in-a-box person. I do need a plan. I do need a guide. But I need the freedom to make my own schedule, to choose to read a different book first or abandon one altogether. Whereas some moms would see freedom in a daily schedule laid out for them, I found it confining.

 

 

So that’s the first thing. The second is that, in my humble opinion, there is way too much work in the program. Way too much.

The volume of reading is crazy! The photo at the top of this post shows you all the books we read and discussed this school year, and I still counted 18 that we didn’t get to!

Maybe it’s because we have a big family and there’s just too much else to do? I don’t know. You’re welcome to chime in here, Sonlight moms. But I became convinced that our family just did not need to do that volume of history, geography, Bible, and literature five days a week.

We wanted the option to add in other read-alouds from our homeschool kids’ book club and personal libraries. And so we were perpetually “behind” in the Instructor’s Guide, and that’s a discouraging feeling.

Now, I’d been warned of this very thing from multiple reviews, and Sonlight itself tells you to adapt the curriculum as needed. But we are a family of very avid readers, and we could not complete the reading load. We got reading fatigue!

My friend Bethany uses Sonlight and told me she chose to buy the 4-day week Instructor’s Guide for next year. If you’re interested in trying the curriculum, that’s my recommendation.

In short: I still love Sonlight!! They are my go-to source for book ideas for children. I’m glad I own so many. We’re still working our way through the books we didn’t finish in the school year, and we enjoy them so much.

I’ve already begun filling my Sonlight shopping cart with resources I’m picking and choosing to supplement our Classical Conversations Ancient History cycle next year. And I look forward to rereading many of the books we studied this year for American History next time that CC cycle comes around.

If you’re new to homeschooling or feel like a box curriculum with set daily schedule will bring you relief and security, please give it a try. But, I won’t buy the full curriculum again.

 

 

How did the year go with Amie’s learning disabilities?

I want to say first of all that Amie gave me permission to talk here about her learning disabilities (dysgraphia and mild dyslexia). The psychologist who tested her did such a wonderful job of talking about her “strong brain” and her gifts, as well as her challenges, that she has never seemed to feel ashamed about it.

I think the very biggest help for David and me after the testing experience was the awareness that her brain literally works differently from ours — and that the academic struggles we were having weren’t based on stubbornness or laziness. It changed everything about this year.

Amie’s learning disabilities are fairly minor. I’m thankful for that. Many children need lots more therapy and help, and I can’t imagine families who labor and labor with so many roadblocks. We’ve been able to make do here at home with input from friends who are professionals. We did a semester of speech, which went great. We met a couple of times this year with a friend from church who is a therapist for kids with learning disabilities, and that was helpful.

Amie’s now reading fluently and we ask her to practice daily for short periods of time. She still much prefers audiobooks, and so we let her listen as much as she wants. Amie has an amazing vocabulary, and told us she writes audiobooks in her head and tells them aloud while she’s riding her scooter. She’s currently dictating a book to me (and is on chapter 7), and also has a journal she carries around and writes stories in.

Thus, I’m not overly concerned about her handwriting and spelling.

 

 

The best motivation for Amie’s spelling this year is to do spelling bees together with the kids on Friday mornings. We all watched the documentary Spellbound together, and it inspired our kids — they asked for the spelling bees. I quiz the kids on their own grade-level weekly list, so they aren’t competing against one another. Wanting to do well like her brothers has helped Amie work harder. Because of her dysgraphia, oral spelling tests are much easier, and so she feels more confident.

Math was still hard for us. It was the most discouraging part of the academic year for me. I was told two years ago to switch her curriculum from Saxon to something for kids who are more visual/kinesthetic learners, and I wish I would’ve listened. Math curriculum is expensive and I just wanted to try to hang in there and modify what we already purchased for her. Well, I can now say that we tried.

We had another tough year with not as much progress as I wanted, and so we’ll be getting Right Start Math for Amie this fall. I have a hunch Noah might have some of the same learning needs that she does, and so hopefully I’ll be able to reuse the curriculum for him.

 

 

What else was challenging?

Well, honestly, it’s challenging not having a dedicated homeschool room.

It’s hard using the dining room, because I must stay very organized. Since we also have a very small kitchen, everything needs to be cleaned up and put away for lunch, and then again at the end of the afternoon. I’d love to have more storage for books and have more of our school things in sight. I’d love a whiteboard on the wall and some artsy posters. But I’ve always said I don’t want our dining room looking completely like school room. I need to eat dinner and not feel like a teacher.

Truly, this is a small challenge. Lots and lots of people homeschool without a dedicated school room. And I’m beyond grateful for the built-in bookcase I got with our hallway addition, where I’ve finally (a year later) organized our homeschool library.

 

 

What makes you excited about next year?

– Classical Conversations.

– Judah starting fifth grade and learning to write papers. I think he’s going to be fantastic at it. I’m happy that he’ll be more academically challenged in ways I just can’t do on my own with him, and that he’ll get to learn in a group setting once again.

– Our book club and field trip group. The moms had a planning day this month and it was so much fun. We have some great new ideas for next year.

– Song School Latin 2. We used level 1 with all the kids this year, and had a great time! I highly recommend this curriculum.

– Morning worship time

– Gabe is now able to read his own daily task list and will begin to work a bit more independently

– Discovering great books together that we don’t yet know exist.

– Noah is starting kindergarten! No more preschoolers in the house! (this is happy and a little sad too. but mostly: happy)

– Doing life and learning with my kids. No one knows the future. And so I cherish every year we get to homeschool.