the pastor's wife

  • depression/anxiety,  the pastor's wife

    life with anxiety and depression, part 2.

    This is the second post in a two-part series about my journey with anxiety and depression (here’s Part One). I’ve wanted to write about my experience in more detail for years. But until now I just wasn’t ready. In fact, I’d get close to a panic attack even imagining exposing myself like this in public. It’s quite a victory that I’m sitting here, writing this for you today, and that I feel peace. It’s a sign that God is freeing me (still slowly, friends) from my fierce desire to protect my image and reputation and be strong. As I hide myself in Him rather than hide my brokenness from people,…

  • depression/anxiety,  the pastor's wife

    life with anxiety and depression, part 1.

    Hi there! After telling you about my recent struggles with anxiety and panic attacks here, and receiving feedback from you guys and others, I wanted to talk some more. I do this, not because its easy for me, but because if you are someone who lives with these battles at all, I want you to know that you’re not alone. If you know someone who struggles, I pray that you’ll come alongside them and just be a friend. Please don’t try to fix it, just sit with them and love them and listen. Ask them what is helpful for them in their low moments. Their mental health is their responsibility,…

  • depression/anxiety,  the pastor's wife

    thirty-four.

    So I turned thirty-four last weekend! If you’re a pastor’s wife, Sunday isn’t the luckiest day to have a birthday, but David and our family made the weekend special. ONE of my children also made me a card, and I’ll let you guess which gender the child is! It feels a bit strange to be thirty-four. To some of you that probably seems old, and to some it’s quite young. But to me . . . I don’t know. I’ve reached my mid-thirties, which means forty is right around the corner. I see crow’s feet in the mirror when I smile, and my feet ache when I wear cheap shoes…

  • adoption,  motherhood,  the pastor's wife

    what worked and what didn’t in 2015.

    As I sat down last week to reflect on the last year, I used an idea from Modern Mrs. Darcy, and came up with a list of things that worked for me in 2015 and things that didn’t. It’s been such a helpful exercise that I thought I’d post my list for you. Not only does it give me some direction for 2016, but it’s allowed me to realize that I’m actually on the right track in several areas of personal habits. Rather than feel the overwhelming need to switch everything up, I just need to grow in a couple areas and then keep on with what’s working. And that’s…

  • adoption,  the pastor's wife

    birthday gratitude.

    114. God’s given me 33 years on this earth 115. getter older is so much more fun than I expected 116. enthusiastic birthday greetings from my two kiddos and nephews bright and early this morning 117. family breakfast at Crepes and Croissants 118. how fun it is to have my birthday a day after Kenny’s 119. amazing gift from David, who hired someone to deep-clean our house this week 120. a lovely first Book and Tea club this afternoon, and many more to come 121. my mother-in-law made gluten free treats for me 122. finding Starbucks coffee on sale 123. the Mitford books, which never lose their charm 124. Home…

  • adoption,  the pastor's wife

    monday gratitude.

    50. two and a half magical days in Charleston with my husband last week 51. staying in a hotel and not lifting a finger to cook or clean 52. long walks, window shopping, eating fabulous food, curling up in bed to watch Rise of the Planet of the Apes together 53. our kids spent two and a half happy days with their grandparents 54. coming home, walking in the door to a dirty house but our house 55. my great obsession: organizing closets 56. wrapping Christmas gifts 57. Indah coffee at the Farmer’s Market 58. laundry spilling out of baskets means we have clothes to wear 59. Gilmore Girls 60.…

  • the pastor's wife

    10 things i don’t do.

    Happy Friday! I was just browsing blogs and found this list, and thought it was genius. So obviously I tend to blog about the things I do, but I in no way do it all. Here’s a few of the things I don’t do right now: 1. buy organic food 2. exercise three times a week 3. run more than 2 miles 4. change my kids’ sheets regularly 5. a good job with any administrative task 6. separate whites from darks or wash on anything other than “cold” cycle 7. throw birthday parties for my kids 8. drink enough water 9. come up with imaginative extra homeschooling projects or crafts…

  • a long obedience in the same direction,  the pastor's wife

    coming home.

    It’s a strange feeling, coming home. Our vacation was so magical and restful that we didn’t want to leave, but our plane landed at the Charlotte airport on Wednesday morning after less than three hours of sleep, and real life hit like the blinding South Carolina sun on the tarmac. We took a bumpy shuttle bus to our car in long-term parking lot 4 and drove the hour-and-a-half to Columbia, and then David had a sermon to write and I found myself in a dirty house because I was sick when we left and we were all four in a fog of jet lag and sleep-deprivation. I felt rested and happy all week long but…

  • a long obedience in the same direction,  the pastor's wife

    my well-being.

    Last time this summer our lives were crazy. David was working around-the-clock to raise funds and prepare for the church plant launch in September. The Sound Panel Project of 2013 was beginning. And oh yeah, and we were buying a house (what!?! we moved during last summer? who thought that was a good idea!?). I know the church hasn’t even been meeting a full year — September 8th is when we began worship services — but in my mind summer, 2013 is really when it started. Though we’d been meeting as a core group all spring, summer is when our lives started careening full-force ahead toward this thing that was about to be…

  • a long obedience in the same direction,  the pastor's wife

    the birthday gift.

    Remember how I told you I gave myself the birthday gift of a new hobby this year? (which I’m enjoying immensely by the way). Well I wanted to tell you about the other birthday gift I decided to give myself now that I’m 32 and securely “in my thirties.” A conversation I had with some girl friends this weekend reminded me of it and it’s this: I’m giving myself permission to stop worrying about what people think of me. You may be chuckling right now. You may be thinking, Oh that’s all!? Well good luck with that one! I know, I know. But here’s the thing: I’ve felt this gradual shift…