homeschooling kindergarten.

We had our Classical Conversations end-of-year presentation last week, and today is our first official day of summer!

I wish I could say we ended the school year with a bang, but fizzled to a halt is more accurate. We crawled painfully ahead, in fits and starts, with schoolwork this past month. The weather was gorgeous and life was busy and no-one wanted to hole up inside doing reading lessons and math worksheets.

We took advantage of warm spring days to have lots of field trips: to the river, the zoo, a lake with 10 different breeds of swans, a nature walk. This made everyone happier. And I had to laugh today when I announced that summer is here, because after all the complaints of the last couple months, Judah said, “Mom, I’m really going to miss school.” I can’t win I guess.

It’s hard to believe our first official year of homeschooling over. I’ve debated blogging about homeschooling or sharing some of these points because I worry you’ll think I’m trying to make a case for homeschooling or that other educational paths aren’t as good.

But, if you know me, you know that’s not at all what I think. Also, remember my birthday gift to myself this year. So instead of telling you about kindergarten, I thought I’d share a few things I love about our homeschooling journey right now.

1. Homeschooling brings us flexibility.
I love the flexibility of homeschooling. I remember struggling when Judah went to five-day-a-week preschool overseas. It was a sweet, positive environment and many days I enjoyed the break from my preschooler, but mostly I just remember that my personality chafed against the schedule (and his did too).

Our family loves to travel, to be spontaneous, to seize a mild October day and take an auto rickshaw to Mysoor Lake to see the blue sailboats. It was just plain hard our to bend our family into the traditional school schedule. By the end of the year, preschool felt like a burden, and choosing to keep Judah home was a restful relief.

Because homeschooling is flexible, I put aside school books many days this spring so we could be outside. I can choose to school year-round if I want — to work at the dining table weekday mornings during the sweltering days of summer so we’re free to take off Friday family days or go to the mountains one week. Or, if we’re behind on a subject, we take school to the mountains with us. I love that flexibility.

2. Homeschooling gives us Daddy Day.
David is a pastor, so weekends are often work days for him. So are many weekday evenings. Friday is his day off, and it’s Daddy Day. He’s done a wonderful job of guarding that day all year long for our family. Life slows down on Fridays. Sometimes we do school, but usually it’s minimal.

Instead we putter around the yard, make a second cup of coffee, do a Lowe’s run, go on a hike, grill out if the weather’s nice. Sometimes we hang out with other people, but by and large, it’s just the four of us all day on Fridays. Without homeschooling, Daddy Day wouldn’t be possible.

3. Homeschooling makes me slow down.
As I’ve mentioned, I can be a very driven person and a perfectionist, and those are two of the biggest areas God is working on in my life right now. Because of David’s unique job, I consider us a team and love being apart of our church work. I’ll confess to you: sometimes I can love it to the point of not making my kids a priority.

Homeschooling has given me a clear boundary to help me slow down. I can’t do lots of things if I’m going to be responsible for my kids’ education. It’s like the Lord knew this very specific thing about my personality when He called me to homeschool.

To me it was terribly inefficient: “Do You realize how much more ministry I could do for You if my kids were in school all day!?” And He responds, “I know, and that’s not what I have for you right now, Julie.” I can argue with Him, or I can trust His plan for this season of my life.

Mornings are pretty much off-limits if school work is going to get done. And I don’t just need the hours in my day, I need creative energy in my life to plan ahead, schedule field trips, make library runs, do our memory work.

If I’m going to do a good job at homeschooling my kids, I need to slow down, to say no more, to find time to “fill my tank” so I can be energized for this task of education. And somehow, in those hours, God builds His kingdom and His Church without me.

4. Homeschooling makes me need Jesus.
At times I’m tempted to go the other extreme and make homeschooling the center of my perfectionist personality — one more thing I must succeed in or I’m failing my family. I think I struggled with this much more at the beginning of the school year, and believe me, there were several afternoons I was on the internet, scouring school websites because I thought, “I can’t do this. I’m failing.”

Homeschooling is hard. It requires work on my part. Sometimes I get tired of being with my kids from dawn ’til dusk, every. single. day. I don’t get to do lunch dates with girl friends or run errands all by myself or have long leisurely phone conversations very often. I get overwhelmed by the thought of educating my children, worried that they’ll fall behind and not learn what they need to. I worry they are missing out not being in a traditional classroom setting with a teacher who is not their mother.

I used to think the struggles meant I should quit homeschooling, but I’ve grown in seeing the challenges as a gift. No-one’s life is easy — not my friends’ whose kids are in school, and not mine. I can’t do this without Jesus. I can’t be perfect. I can’t do it all. He’s using this journey to constantly put a finger on those deep-down idols in my heart and pry them free.

He’s reminding me daily, “This is about your relationship with your kids; not about perfection. Don’t you dare make your image or your need to prove yourself more important than these precious souls I’ve given you.” Homeschooling makes me need Him.

5. Homeschooling allows me to be in control of my children’s education.
No, I’m not an expert on education. But I am an expert on my kids. I love how homeschooling allows me to tailor their education to their strengths and weaknesses. I’m only just beginning to scratch the surface of this, but it’s been a great thing for Judah and Amelie. There are some areas they are ahead in; some they’re behind.

Homeschooling lets us go at our own pace with their unique learning styles. It lets Judah learn actively, to be outdoors and move around more (literally doing reading lessons hanging head first off the couch), and sit by himself drawing for hours if he’s had too much people-time. It lets me check out 20 books from the library each week and spend the afternoon cuddling on the sofa reading together.

It’s especially freeing now that I’m growing a circle of people who are experts in education, who can speak into different areas — how do I gently push Judah in reading when he hates doing it? How can I challenge him more in math because he’s clearly bored? How can I let Amie continue to write and sound out words to her heart’s content?

Besides teacher friends and fellow homeschoolers, I regularly ask questions of our public librarians and have learned they are fountains of information. I love finding this balance of being in control while having lots of help from folks I respect.

6. Homeschooling means I learn with my kids.
After our co-op’s end-of-the-year presentation last week, David told me, “The thing I most regret is that I can’t learn all of this stuff along with you guys.” I’ve loved all the timeline facts and history sentences and even science and math facts we’ve learned this year. It stretches my mind in a way it hasn’t been stretched in years. It makes me marvel all over again, like a kid.

Judah and Amie have learned more than I thought possible. They surprise me again and again with their capabilities. Judah has a voracious memory and knows more world geography right now than I do. Amie has transformed from shyly mumbling, eyes down, during her weekly class presentation, into a poised, confident little girl, speaking brightly and making eye contact as she speaks. I’m learning about them even as I learn with them.

I’ve had a love-hate relationship with teaching my son to read, just as I’m sure he has. It’s been hard many days, but God has forced me to become a more patient, more gentle mom with him. I’m a different reading teacher than I was back in August. And on the days we’ve stopped, both of us in tears, and said, “God, help us! We can’t do this,” He’s helped. Judah and I are learning together.

7. Homeschooling gives us a community.
This last point is probably my favorite because it’s our year’s biggest surprise. I started Classical Conversations very tentatively, mostly just for my kids to be challenged academically and have a weekly classroom experience. I had a very busy life and lots of friends and my posture was: I just don’t need more relationships to pour into right now. Also, I was probably more than a little intimidated by walking into a large group of women I didn’t know.

But God surprised me by showing me I was wrong: that I did have needs. There are areas in my life in which I give a lot, and this area has been one of pure receiving. I love, love being a pastor’s wife, but I also love our homeschool co-op where I’m not a pastor’s wife; I’m just a mom trying to teach her kids, like everyone else.

The women at Classical Conversations have welcomed me with open arms, and they inspire me to welcome other newcomers in the same way. I can share about the hard days, when I lose my temper and just want out. And I can share the victories too, the astonishment of seeing one of the kids grasp something new, the little unique things to home education that everyone there understands.

I love this group of people with interests like me, who can talk about nerdy things like math textbooks or how much we adore the Little House on the Prairie series. But mostly we just laugh. A lot.

And I’ve seen the change in my kids. It’s inspiring to be in an environment every week where they’re challenged with their peers, where a teacher other than their mom is affirming and correcting and guiding them, and where they see a big group of other kids learning the same things.  It’s given them homeschooling friends their age (and older! and younger!) whom they love and look forward to playing with after school.

I can’t imagine homeschooling without our community.

So this is us at the close of kindergarten, ready to take a little break, then dive into another year. It’s not perfect, but we’re happy here and now. Judah will be in first grade and Amie will start kindergarten. I can hardly believe we’ll no longer have preschoolers in the house (big sigh).

Next year will look different — both because I have legal requirements with the state for Judah’s first grade year, and because, Lord willing, Gentino baby #3 will join our family at some point. I’m excited to see what’s next.

For now though, I’m thrilled to enjoy the summer with these goofballs!