baby #3.

Well that got your attention, didn’t it?

Yep, it’s true! Lord willing, there’s going to be a Gentino baby #3. We started the adoption process this week!

Ten months ago today I wrote this post about dying to my dream of adopting kids, about learning contentment with my “right now family.” I really thought that was that. A closed chapter.

But God has opened it again. He always surprises, doesn’t He?

It happened so fast that we’re still reeling in a way from the shock of it. And in a way we’re not. Because it also seems like the most natural thing.

You make think I’m crazy but the seed of the idea came a few weeks ago in the car one day, when Judah said, “Mom, I just know God is going to give us a baby. I’m going to pray for one.” If you know Judah, you know he adores babies. Both kids do.

I told David later and we chuckled but somehow Judah’s words niggled at the back of my mind after that. Could that actually happen? Isn’t it too late?

We had a of couple tentative conversations. Very tentative. Then a few more. Then in the mountains last week I decided, What the heck, and filled out a preliminary application with Bethany Christian Services, an agency that’s come highly recommended by so many friends. Someone responded right away and invited us to an informational meeting in Columbia on Friday. We quick got a babysitter (thanks, Anna!), and found ourselves sitting for two hours in a room with a roomful of people, learning about Bethany and about the adoption process.

This agency is the perfect fit for our family and we submitted our formal application this week. We’re pursuing an infant adoption from South Carolina. We will attend a day-long class at the end of April, then begin our home study process.

Can you believe it?

Yes there have been some sleepless nights. Sometimes my anxiety kicks in with all of the unknowns, all the things I can’t control. But at the same time both of us have this overriding certainty, It’s time.

How could I have known?

All along I thought God was saying, “No.” But He was just saying, “Wait.” Wait, Julie. Take a deep breath and put down some roots. Rest and find yourself and be at peace. There’s plenty of time.

And in that way, I cry with happiness because I have a Father who so tenderly cares for my heart. He sees me. He knows my dreams. Some He’s taken away for good. Some He’s stretched and shaped into something else. And some He’s given back to me, in His perfect time. I don’t deserve any of it. But I receive His gifts with a humbled heart of joy.

I can’t wait to tell you all about our journey.